1. "Dog whisperer" should be referenced often, especially the part of being the "pack leader".
2. Keep things educational. Instead of saying "Don't lick the door", say "Don't lick that RED door that is shaped like a RECTANGLE".
3. Don't worry about milestones. Very few adults still wear pampers and suck on their thumbs.
4. Leave negotiating for the movies with bad plots. To get results, see #1.
5. Stop taking 5000 pictures of your kid. Put your camera down for a moment. Capture the moment in your mind: the way she smells, the light in her eyes, the pure goodness of it all. THAT is the place you will go to when you are 100 years old and peacefully dying in your sleep.
6. Remember how good it felt when your parents said "Good job. I am proud of you". Yea...me neither. So, do it for YOUR kid and do it often.
7. Be really good to her nanny, her daycare, her neighbors. They all have a part in NOT making her a serial killer one day.
8. Create a world with your kid that is purely yours, the language that only two of you speak, the story that you imagined together. That is her real comfort blanket.
9. Stop worrying about crayon marks on your wall, cheerios all over the floor and poop in your hair. One day you will nostalgically smile thinking of all those things.
10. Be just a little bit silly. After all you just got a green light to relive your childhood.
