I wasn't feeling well yesterday, so my judgement was even more clouded than usual. To make the time pass before "does it get any better?" "Mad Men", I made an emotionally fatal mistake by watching "My monkey baby". TLC's new found gem is the show about people who get a monkey and then treat it as their baby. Enough said. Here are a few parts of the show that emotionally scarred me for life.
1. Putting lipstick and eye shadow on your monkey after realizing that she is a teenager now.
2. Introducing your 2 week old "baby" to your two huge pitbulls.
3. Sloppy mouth to mouth kissing between a 70 year old and (yes, you guessed it) her pet monkey.
4. Selecting a number of girl dresses and then proceeding to try them on on her with the statements like "This one is only $28".
5. Putting your "baby" in a stroller and then going to a restaurant, while pointing out that she behaves better than other children.
6. Putting your monkey in a will.
7. Celebrating her birthday with cake, balloons and wrapped up stuffed monkey as one of her many presents.
8. Calling your psychic after a climatic discovery of missing anti-depressants to see if the monkey ate them. Next camera shot... monkey dozing off on her "mother's" shoulder.
9. Continuous high pitch screaming "Are you taking your panties off?", as your ape franticly scratching off her diaper.
10. Soothing your "baby" with a monkey DVD before she drifts off to sleep.
With that said... I am a lucky one. I wanted to have a kid one day and I have one. My heart bleeds a little knowing that all these women really wanted to have kids and just couldn't. As creepy, bazaar and delusional the show is...I am not the one to judge. I am just pointing out the extreme of it all that should be replaced with a healthy dose of much needed therapy.